Identifying Our Self-Healing Baseline
Identifying where we rest and becoming familiar with that space starts by learning how to “Check-in” with our body, mind, and soul. It manifests slowly and grows into a practice of engaging with yourself and building trust with what you hear and feel.
The priority of this is to create a conscious opening in the line of communication between your body, mind, and soul where there once was a severing. This severing happened for a reason; it happened to protect you. Which means that as we enter into this practice there will be a pain waiting to be experienced. It is crucial to understand that we will not feel the pain we are not yet safe to feel.
Our bodies are intelligent. This is why triggers occur at the onset of entering into new seasons of safety, and outside of the normalization of pain. We are triggered because our bodies are alerting us in an attempt to reconnect to the brain and restore our awareness of body sensations and lived emotions. They learn to be autonomous, but traumas have stripped us of that autonomy.
As we start to familiarize ourselves with the sensations we’ve been “cut-off” from, we will witness these residual energy spikes. The alerts, I aforementioned. These alerts ping the brain and push it into the flight, fight, or freeze simply because that’s what it has been used to operating from. A dissociation of self-a severing of the body, mind, soul connection-in order to protect us from harm. Something known as disembodiment. Drawing attention to the need to start small, understanding that we are allowed to set this work down, so we can return to it without feeling completely overwhelmed.
What we are choosing to do now is rewire how the brain responds. Inviting it to slowly wade into trust with the body again. This looks like doing small things every day in an effort to ensure our brain that it no longer needs to react out of disembodied flight, fight, or freeze. It can be a witness to the sensations of the body, in the present tense, without immediately fearing harm or expecting threat. Instead, we are slowly reclaiming the powerful unity between the mind, body, and soul and creating, once again, new lived experiences. Experiences that saddle up beside the old, and provide a stronger ground to create autonomy from.
There needs to be a clear focus on pulling our efforts and energy inward through small and intimates means. Authoring a partnership with our body, mind, and soul through building trust in and choosing to reconnect what once needed to break in order for us to endure. I often talk about how, during the long term lived experiences of trauma, our scale that we examine from shrinks down to allow us to not become jarred from experiencing anything outside our trauma experience. This is commonly known as normalization, and it happens to prevent us from digesting any other lived experiences than the one we are existing in that lacks safety and stability. Leading us to eventually create a bond with the chaos.
When we are experiencing long term trauma and there is no known date of when this lived experience will shift the body, mind, and soul connection fractures. We silence our innate discernment, our authority in knowing our personal boundaries and consent, and we lose touch with our emotions and autonomy of responses. If this long term trauma occurs during development, that often also means that we never had the chance to embody our autonomy or define our own experiences at all. Regardless of where you rest in this, or what your lived experience of trauma has taught you, the reality is that we all move into survival mode. From this space, life happens to us and we simply just learn how to handle it. Becoming experts at navigating the chaos and eventually feeling even connected to it; re bond.
--Owning My Triggers and Reclaiming My Autonomy
A resource I've authored to partner with you in your self-healing. Available for all at a sliding scale rate (and free for those who need it). All proceeds support my academic work and my emotional labor.